Mar 17, 2011

the Right foot forward or is it the left?

Hello readers, well its been months since I have posted on this blog and its about dang time to update / start posting again! When I FINALLY hit my goal weight in the summer of 2010 a new problem seemed to arise. One thing many who struggle with their weight DON'T think about is what happens when you finally achieve your goal?? 

After about a month of transitioning into the "wellness" plan and maintaining my weight, I felt like I was in a limbo area. I created a new goal of running a half marathon which at the time was a GREAT goal. I happily crossed that finish line in November. However, I didn't realize what was really going on... For years I was always looked in the mirror and would say well one day I will be skinny.. or when I am skinny... Well ladies and gentleman I am here, what do I look in the mirror and say now??  Yes I am so thankful for where I am at and so happy with what I have achieved. I have so much more confidence than I could have ever imagined. I think every step in anyones' weight-loss journey has a difficult aspect to it and of course "maintaining" the weight is another challenge in itself. But if for years your mentality is to get skinny/get fit how do you stop this need and want, and be happy with maintaining.

 During the holidays I really fell off the bandwagon when it came to eating right and exercizing, almost in a self sabotaging way. Almost unconsciously gaining weight so I could have the goal of losing it again! I of course re-evaluated when jan. 1st 2011 came around and after those first few weeks in January did some serious self reflection. I think for every woman who finally achieves their weight - loss dream on the occasion they still see the old person they used to be or begin to obsess that they are going to back to how they were. So in my reflection I realized I am just as guilty as all average american women about STILL standing in front of the mirror and picking those last few areas that "could be better" apart. Recognizing the problem is the first step in releasing yourself from this re-occurring behavior right?? Its pretty insane how body image is ingrained in all of our minds to the point where it is second nature. 

Anywho, I have devised a plan to begin complete and full acceptance... Instead of being the "person who in the past year lost weight" or the "person who used to be overweight" embracing the idea that I am a "person who IS fit and healthy" .. creating a NEW story about who I AM not reliving an old story about who I WAS. Its almost the same idea for people who smoke and their mentality when they finally overcome the addiction and are smoke free. Instead of thinking of themselves as a person who used to smoke but thinking of themselves as someone who doesn't smoke. Does that make any sense??  

Its time to move and put whatever foot it is thats best forward. I have managed to maintain my weight, with a few extra pounds here and a few less pounds there, for almost a year. I have now enlisted the help of a personal trainer. Not for reasons to lose any more weight but to help me get in a great fitness routine. To help me create the story / journey of the now. The story that Carrie is a healthy fit person that can kick ass and take names!